The Elevated Envelope

A few months ago I signed up for the Elevated Envelope project. I found information about the project on the LWA website and I thought it looked like fun. I’ve spent the last few months making my envelopes and they are finally ready to go in the mail (ahead of the May 15 deadline).

I decided to do use a theme for my design but I wanted to make each envelope unique, so because it is National Poetry month and I’m a poet, I decided to use poetry as my theme. I picked 10 of my favorite poems and designed each envelope around that poem. I enclosed a copy of the poem and a brief note inside the envelope. Hopefully, my recipients will enjoy them.

Elizabeth Bishop “The Fish,” Rita Dove “Daystar,” Robert Hayden “Those Winter Sundays”& James Wright “A Blessing.”

Pablo Neruda “Sonnet XVII,” Wallace Stevens “Sunday Morning” & Emily Dickinson “#254.”

Mark Strand “Eating Poetry,” Mary Oliver “Sleeping in the Forest” & Frank O’Hara “Why I Am Not a Painter.”

It’s Just a Little Sapling…

This past Friday I received the first part of my order from Spring Hill Nursery, so Sunday I spent most of the afternoon planting and weeding. Usually, wedding entails dandelions and wild strawberry plants and even some stinging nettles. However, all of these foes, while abundant and annoying, come out of the ground without much of a problem. This was especially true Sunday because we’d had some rain over the weekend, so the soil was moist and easier to dig into. I got a lot done on the weeding front Sunday, so when I looked toward the back of the yard and saw two small saplings growing by the side of our garage, I thought “Well, I can pull those out too.” Famous last words.

The first of the two small trees came out rather easily. It was younger and the moist ground let the roots grow with minimal tugging. Then I moved onto the second tree. I pushed it. I pulled it. I twisted it. I swore. I got out the shovel. I began to dig. I dug from the left side. I dug from the right side. The good news? After digging for about five minutes, the tangled nest of roots slowly began to appear. The bad news? These roots apparently went to China and then kept going. At this point I snapped the first half of the sapling off because it was getting in my way. And I kept digging. By the time I was done digging, I had a very deep, very narrow hole by the side of my garage but it was worth it. With one more solid tug, the roots let go and out came the sapling. The whole ordeal took about forty five minutes. And where was my husband you ask? Asleep. On the couch.

The two saplings. The lower tree was the easier of the two to remove.

The giant root bulb of the second, larger tree.

In other news, our shrub rose has produced its first bloom of the season:

Happy National Poetry Month!

April is National Poetry Month and I’m involved in several events though my community college that celebrate the crafting and speaking of the written word. I participated in a panel discussion yesterday about Why Art Matters and the student creative writing group that I advise will be hosting an open mic event in a few weeks.

In the spirit of National Poetry Month and all that we do to celebrate it, I give you my top five favorite poems. These are poems I remember, these are poems I share in my classes and these are poems that are important to me not only because of their language and subject but because they stir up memories.

1. The Fish~ Elizabeth Bishop

I caught a tremendous fish
and held him beside the boat
half out of water, with my hook
fast in a corner of his mouth.
He didn’t fight.
He hadn’t fought at all.
He hung a grunting weight,
battered and venerable
and homely. Here and there
his brown skin hung in strips
like ancient wallpaper,
and its pattern of darker brown
was like wallpaper:
shapes like full-blown roses
stained and lost through age.
He was speckled and barnacles,
fine rosettes of lime,
and infested
with tiny white sea-lice,
and underneath two or three
rags of green weed hung down.
While his gills were breathing in
the terrible oxygen
–the frightening gills,
fresh and crisp with blood,
that can cut so badly–
I thought of the coarse white flesh
packed in like feathers,
the big bones and the little bones,
the dramatic reds and blacks
of his shiny entrails,
and the pink swim-bladder
like a big peony.
I looked into his eyes
which were far larger than mine
but shallower, and yellowed,
the irises backed and packed
with tarnished tinfoil
seen through the lenses
of old scratched isinglass.
They shifted a little, but not
to return my stare.
–It was more like the tipping
of an object toward the light.
I admired his sullen face,
the mechanism of his jaw,
and then I saw
that from his lower lip
–if you could call it a lip
grim, wet, and weaponlike,
hung five old pieces of fish-line,
or four and a wire leader
with the swivel still attached,
with all their five big hooks
grown firmly in his mouth.
A green line, frayed at the end
where he broke it, two heavier lines,
and a fine black thread
still crimped from the strain and snap
when it broke and he got away.
Like medals with their ribbons
frayed and wavering,
a five-haired beard of wisdom
trailing from his aching jaw.
I stared and stared
and victory filled up
the little rented boat,
from the pool of bilge
where oil had spread a rainbow
around the rusted engine
to the bailer rusted orange,
the sun-cracked thwarts,
the oarlocks on their strings,
the gunnels–until everything
was rainbow, rainbow, rainbow!
And I let the fish go. 

This is the first Elizabeth Bishop poem I ever read and it started my love affair with her and her work. If you read my blog at all, you know how much I love her. This poem introduced me to the idea of poetry making the ordinary extraordinary and it also made me realize how important observation and image are to making successful poetry.

2. Those Winter Sundays~Robert Hayden 

Sundays too my father got up early
and put his clothes on in the blueblack cold,
then with cracked hands that ached
from labor in the weekday weather made
banked fires blaze. No one ever thanked him.

I’d wake and hear the cold splintering, breaking.
When the rooms were warm, he’d call,
and slowly I would rise and dress,
fearing the chronic angers of that house,

Speaking indifferently to him,
who had driven out the cold
and polished my good shoes as well.
What did I know, what did I know
of love’s austere and lonely offices?

I love this poem because it reminds me of my father and my grandfather and all the men I’ve met in my life that work hard for their families. It is a sad poem but also a celebratory poem. I think it speaks a truth that many of us can relate to.

3.  A Blessing~James Wright

Just off the highway to Rochester, Minnesota,
Twilight bounds softly forth on the grass.
And the eyes of those two Indian ponies
Darken with kindness.
They have come gladly out of the willows
To welcome my friend and me.
We step over the barbed wire into the pasture
Where they have been grazing all day, alone.
They ripple tensely, they can hardly contain their happiness
That we have come.
They bow shyly as wet swans. They love each other.
There is no loneliness like theirs.
At home once more,
They begin munching the young tufts of spring in the darkness.
I would like to hold the slenderer one in my arms,
For she has walked over to me
And nuzzled my left hand.
She is black and white,
Her mane falls wild on her forehead,
And the light breeze moves me to caress her long ear
That is delicate as the skin over a girl's wrist.
Suddenly I realize
That if I stepped out of my body I would break
Into blossom.

I chose this poem to be read at my wedding, so if that’s isn’t a testament to how much I love it, I don’t know what is. I had horses growing up and I think what attracted me to this poem at first was how perfectly Wright captured their mannerisms. Later, I admired the final lines of the poem and the subtle way in which Wright wrote a poem about love without all the bells and whistles.


4. What the Living Do~Marie Howe

  

Johnny, the kitchen sink has been clogged for days, some utensil probably fell down there.
And the Drano won't work but smells dangerous, and the crusty dishes have piled up

waiting for the plumber I still haven't called. This is the everyday we spoke of.
It's winter again: the sky's a deep, headstrong blue, and the sunlight pours through

the open living-room windows because the heat's on too high in here and I can't turn it off.
For weeks now, driving, or dropping a bag of groceries in the street, the bag breaking,

I've been thinking: This is what the living do. And yesterday, hurrying along those
wobbly bricks in the Cambridge sidewalk, spilling my coffee down my wrist and sleeve,

I thought it again, and again later, when buying a hairbrush: This is it.
Parking. Slamming the car door shut in the cold. What you called that yearning.

What you finally gave up. We want the spring to come and the winter to pass. We want
whoever to call or not call, a letter, a kiss—we want more and more and then more of it.

But there are moments, walking, when I catch a glimpse of myself in the window glass,
say, the window of the corner video store, and I'm gripped by a cherishing so deep

for my own blowing hair, chapped face, and unbuttoned coat that I'm speechless:
I am living. I remember you.
I am naturally attracted to poets who write about grief. I think it is because I wrote many of my first poems while I was grieving, so Marie Howe’s poetry resonates with me very strongly. If I were to be honest, I would just list her book What the Living Do, because it is one of my favorites.


5. The Floating~ Katrina Vandenberg  


When he was dying, she stayed with him all night,
but one night, restless. she walked around a corner
and found a dim hall full of children's breathing
rising from small white beds. She had drifted into
the flating, the children's hospital boat
being rocked to sleep in the harbor again
the way it was a hundred summers ago.
The horizon of her life had vanished--traffic
lights, students with Chinese food takeout boxes
stories down. Now bustled dresses drooped
over the backs of chairs: now immigrant mothers
in flimsy shifts bent over beds and whispered,
tendrils of their hair escaping their tidy knots,
their feet unsteady on the pitch of breath.
 
This poem is from Vandenberg’s book Atlas. I love this book and this is my favorite poem from the the collection. It is haunting and beautiful and a little bit like a dream.

Back to the Garden

Spring has come to the Midwest abnormally early this year, which resulted in my husband and I looking out at our back yard last week and saying, “do we live in the jungle?” A few weeks of above average 80 degree weather and some rain and our little yard was beginning to resemble the Amazon, so after running a 5k on Saturday morning, my husband went out and tackled the grass. It took two rounds with the mower and the first time he had to prop it up on its wheels because the grass was too tall for the blade. Needless to say, it was annoying but our front and back yard look much better now.

Sunday I spent about three hours outdoors weeding and pruning and checking to see what had and had not survived the winter. There were only a few causalities and overall, everything appears to be in good shape. I am writing this blog post on my back porch because we figured it was time to bring up the patio furniture. Do you know when I brought up the patio furniture last year? May.

This fall I am planting massive amounts of daffodils but for now, I’ve got a few doubles.

Last spring/summer it got so hot so fast that our dogwood didn’t bloom.

Remnants from the fall.

Peonies are budded.

My clematis is chock full of buds. It’s going to be beautiful this year.

My hydrangea lived through the winter is growing. Success!

This spring is the first time I have ever ordered flowers through a nursery but I received a gift certificate as a wedding gift, so last Friday I put in my order. My plants should be here in a few weeks and I can’t wait to plant them. I picked a lot of hardy and colorful plants because I like lots of color but nothing that has to be pampered too much. Here’s what I bought:

Rhododendron

Butterfly Bush.

Red Carpet Phlox.

Sunshine Gaillardia Mix

Red Penstemon
Hollyhocks

On My 31st Birthday My Family Gave to Me…

My mom painted these for me. I LOVE them.

RJ and I are going to the symphony tomorrow.

My grandparents sent me this neat assortment of silver. My favorite is the little teapot.

Pear earrings from my parents. I borrowed my mom’s when I got married and she decided I needed some of my own.

Napkin rings from my grandparents. I love the designs.

These are from my mother-in-law. Royale Bouquet smells divine.

My card from RJ. I don’t like hearts.

His cards are the best.

Finding Our Way Back…

It has been a strange few weeks in my world. Just yesterday, I finished The Descendants, a novel about many things, but ultimately about the loss of a loved one. The news has been full of the death of 17 year old Trayvon Martin and not more than an hour ago I learned, via social media, that poet Adrienne Rich passed away today at the age of 82.

In 2008 I posted this poem by Adrienne Rich:

In Those Years
In those years, people will say, we lost track
of the meaning of we, of you
we found ourselves
reduced to I
and the whole thing became
silly, ironic, terrible:
we were trying to live a personal life
and, yes, that was the only life
we could bear witness to

But the great dark birds of history screamed and plunged
into our personal weather
They were headed somewhere else but their beaks and pinions drove
along the shore, through rages of fog
where we stood, saying I

This poem seems particularly poignant to me this week. The news is full of Trayvon and Tyler Clementi and Dharun Ravi. There are politicians on NPR screaming about contraception and same sex marriage and the Supreme Court is currently debating on whether or not health care is constitutional. Forgive me for a slight moment of pessimism, but perhaps we have lost track. 
I discovered Rich as an undergraduate and read “Diving into the Wreck” just like every other budding poet. I admired her poems but I think I admired her guts more. She was brave. She was political. She was unapologetic and she wrote it all down. She gave voice to difficult subjects, subjects we don’t like to look at and she made us look them right in the eye. But now, she’s gone.
As I type this post, I feel my chest tightening. It could be because I am tired and slightly bogged down in the horrors from the world this week. It could be because I am oversensitive. It could be because I see Trayvon in the faces of my students but I think it is simply because another great voice, a voice I took comfort in, has been silenced and I’m not quite sure where that leaves me. 

Because It’s Important Part II…

On Thursday January 20, 2011 I posted the following poem by Randall Mann to my blog:

September Elegies

in memory of Seth Walsh, Justin Aaberg, Billy Lucas, and Tyler Clementi

There are those who suffer in plain sight,
there are those who suffer in private.
Nothing but secondhand details:
a last shower, a request for a pen, a tall red oak.

There are those who suffer in private.
The one in Tehachapi, aged 13.
A last shower, a request for a pen, a tall red oak:
he had had enough torment, so he hanged himself.

The one in Tehachapi, aged 13;
the one in Cooks Head, aged 15:
he had had enough torment, so he hanged himself.
He was found by his mother.

The one in Cooks Head, aged 15.
The one in Greensburg, aged 15:
he was found by his mother.
“I love my horses, my club lambs. They are the world to me,”

the one in Greensburg, aged 15,
posted on his profile.
“I love my horses, my club lambs. They are the world to me.”
The words turn and turn on themselves.

Posted on his profile,
“Jumping off the gw bridge sorry”:
the words turn, and turn on themselves,
like the one in New Brunswick, aged 18.

Jumping off the gw bridge sorry.
There are those who suffer in plain sight
like the one in New Brunswick, aged 18.
Nothing but secondhand details.

Last Friday, March 16, 2012, a jury convicted  Dharun Ravi (Clementi’s roommate) of “of invasion of privacy, witness tampering and evidence tampering, plus bias intimidation…”*

I’m conflicted about this verdict. I admittedly do not know all the details of this case. What I do know is that Tyler Clementi threw himself off the George Washington Bridge and now his roommate is going to jail. What I do know is that lives are ruined and it doesn’t make me angry or vengeful. It just makes me sad. What I do know is that the final refrain of this poem is even more poignant to me now than it was last year.

Why audiobooks are cool…

I’m not the type of person who reads one book at a time. I like to have several books and/or magazines going at once, but sometimes this presents a problem in terms of time management. The first book I ever listened to on CD was Cormac McCarthy’s The Road. I had read the book once but I was going to be attending a seminar for my MFA program that had The Road on the reading list but I knew I wasn’t going to have time to read it again, so I got it on CD and listened to it while I drove to Kentucky.

I like the idea of listening to books while driving, especially on my commute to and from work. I also like the idea of listening to a book while out running errands. I feel like I’m taking advantage of “wasted time” and that makes me feel better about running around all day.

One of the potential downfalls of listening to books on CD is that you can get caught up in the story and then end up sitting in the parking lot of the gym for a half an hour when you’re supposed to be doing sprints on the treadmill (I’m not saying I did this today. Oh no…). 

Right now I’m listening to The Descendants by Kaui Hart Hemmings and I’m really enjoying it. There are 8 discs total and I’m on disc 3. It ‘s a really good story with solid characters. I’ve heard about the movie and I’d like to see it once I’m done with the book but I can tell already that the movie must have condensed a fair amount of the story because it is full of detail and character development. If they put all the detail in the first 8 chapters in the movie, it would be 3 hours long. I’ll have a longer post in a couple of weeks when I’ve finished the book.