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Friday (Finally) Musings

English Sonnet

London returns in damp, fragmented flurries
when I should be doing something else. A scrap
of song, a pink scarf, and I’m back to curries
and pub food, and long, wet walks without a map,
bouts of bronchitis, a case of the flu,
my halfhearted studies and brooding thoughts
and scanning faces in every bar for you.
Those months come down to moments or small plots,
like the bum on the Tube, enraged that no one spoke,
who raved and spat, the whole car thick with dread,
only to ask, won’t someone tell a joke?
and this mouse of a woman offered, What’s big and red
and sits in a corner?
A naughty bus.
Not funny, I know. But neither’s the story of us.

Chelsea Rathburn from Poetry February 2009
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Another piece of information in the growing saga that is is the disappearance of the book:
In a move that could bolster the growing popularity of e-books, Google said Thursday that the 1.5 million public domain books it had scanned and made available free on PCs were now accessible on mobile devices like the iPhone and the T-Mobile G1.
This is the quote that closes the article: “Consumers will trade a certain amount of quality for convenience and cost,” said Michael Gartenberg, an independent technology analyst.
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I’ve been following the blog chronicling the first 100 poems written for the first 100 days of the Obama Adminstration. After all the hoopla surrounding Elizabeth Alexander’s reading, I thought I’d take a stab at it. Alexander’s poem is accomplished. Mine is not. This is a first draft, and I wrote it last week. It isn’t supposed to be anything but a poem I tried to write (that’s my generic disclaimer).
Voices

The halls vibrate with shared voices.
Students crowd outside classrooms, looking
up from their iphones, tucking MP3 players
back into their pockets. Pressed together, they read
copies of the Indianapolis Star, spread open and held
by many hands, murmuring quotes and figures.

Pushing into class, they ask questions
about speech, poetry, and prayer. Across
the street, grown men emerge from the auto
labs to watch the televisions set up outside
the cafeteria. They returned to school for
promotions but just yesterday a Honda plant
closed in Greenwood and now these men
clutch class schedules in their hands wearily
reading descriptions about engineering, accounting,
and communications.

A woman stands in front of the largest T.V. Her
hair is a pure white cloud held in place with pins.
She is studying Spanish and often strolls the halls
of our department, a thick wooden walking stick
stomping out her arrival. Her eyes are still, caught
in a clear gaze, but her lips tremble as the cameras
pan out to the audience.

The audience all wrapped up in wool, cotton, and
down but underneath they speak Spanish, French,
and Afrikaans. They oil engines, they build bridges,
and they crunch numbers. This audience studies literature,
religion, and history. They sing hymns, pop songs, and opera.

This audience and this student are waiting,
waiting for his voice to come forward
and rise above the cold.

Tuesday (Snow. Again.) Musings

I think I’m over winter. The weather forecasted “snow showers” for today but when I left at 7:30 this morning, the snow was coming down at a steady clip. Needless to say, the morning commute was a mess. My students were all late (understandably) and one student informed me that they had closed three of the major interstates. The weather service issued a Severe Winter Weather Advisory and it is in effect until noon. I hope it stops snowing, because otherwise the evening commute is going to be very messy.
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I’ve discovered a market, Georgetown Market, that sells meat from local Indiana farms as well as cheese, eggs, and baked goods. I’ve decided to start dividing my grocery shopping between Georgetown and the Farmer’s Market. I really want to support local farmers and I think this is important. As an important side note, RJ and I had pork chops last night and they tasted wonderful.
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This article gives me hope:

In a hundred ways, we pretend that screen experiences are books —
PowerBooks, notebooks, e-books — but even a child knows the difference. Reading books is an operation with paper. Playing games on the Web is something else entirely. I need to admit this to myself, too. I try to believe that reading online is reading-plus, with the text searchable, hyperlinked and accompanied by video, audio, photography and graphics. But maybe it’s just not reading at all. Just as screens aren’t books.

One of the ways I like to procrastinate is by browsing the NY Times Arts & Design section and looking at their slide shows. Here are a few of my favorite pieces:

“The Dessert,” 1940, by Pierre Bonnard

“Time of Change,” 1943, by Morris Graves

Monday Musings

Her Kind
I have gone out, a possessed witch,
haunting the black air, braver at night;
dreaming evil, I have done my hitch
over the plain houses, light by light:
lonely thing, twelve-fingered, out of mind.
A woman like that is not a woman, quite.
I have been her kind.
I have found the warm caves in the woods,
filled them with skillets, carvings, shelves,
closets, silks, innumerable goods;
fixed the suppers for the worms and the elves:
whining, rearranging the disaligned.
A woman like that is misunderstood.
I have been her kind.
I have ridden in your cart, driver,
waved my nude arms at villages going by,
learning the last bright routes, survivor
where your flames still bite my thigh
and my ribs crack where your wheels wind.
A woman like that is not ashamed to die.
I have been her kind.
Anne Sexton
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The Steelers won The Super Bowl last night. It was a tense game but those are the kind I like best. Watching one team destroy another isn’t much fun. I liked this cartoon depiction posted on ESPN’s page two this morning.
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Friday (Cooking!) Musings

RJ has created a blog to document Greg’s progress throughout his recovery. This is the link to the page.

My creative writing class was great again last night. We talked about voice and character in writing. I devised this exercise where I gave my students four index cards. One card had a name, another an age, another an occupation, and the final card had one or two personality traits. Then I put the students in small groups and asked them to put their characters in a situation together so they could interact. They seemed to enjoy it and begin to understand how to make a character.

The snowstorm we got on Tuesday/Wednesday morning continues to be annoying. The owners of our apartment building came during lunch yesterday and plowed out the parking lot. This is awesome, but of course the only person who didn’t move their car was the girl who parks next to me, so when I got home last night I still couldn’t park in my spot. I switched with RJ and he parked on the street.

Today is my first cooking class at school. I’m really looking forward to it.
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I will be watching the Superbowl this weekend. The Steelers are RJ’s team, so in that spirit here is probably one of the few sports related articles you’ll see on this blog.

Myron Cope left behind something far more personal than a legacy of terrycloth, a battle flag for a city and its team. In 1996, he handed over the trademark to the Terrible Towel to the Allegheny Valley School. It is a network of campuses and group homes across Pennsylvania for people with severe intellectual and developmental disabilities. It receives almost all the profits from sales of the towels.

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I’ve started following the blog Starting Today: Poems for the First 100 Days. I like the concept and I think I might try it myself. I’m not expecting anything, but I think it’s worth thinking about. I’ve linked to this page under my Links section.

I like the one posted yesterday:

Day #10: John Paul O’Connor

New Time Old Time

The unchosen have always been the starbeams
for the poor, the tortured and beaten, the homeless,
the suffocated. They have been the wind that bursts
open poppies in an endless field, just as this morning
the January wind blew the seeds of this poem jotted
down with coffee 3 days before my daughter’s 39th birthday.
She is, at this moment, in a classroom downtown studying
nursing, while her daughter, my little Izzie, sits
at Wanda’s Daycare spilling blocks onto the carpet
with no awareness of the children’s blood spilling
in the Congo while fathers’ heads are crushed
like brittle stone and mothers’ bodies are torn open
by monstrous attackers, children they, all written
off as lost Africa which will remain lost for the next 100
days as it has for the past 300 years. It’s a tell of people
my age when you hear us say, I’ve seen this before,
Camelot and the revolution just around the corner.
Today my around the corner is the Fine Fare,
where I pick up milk, orange juice and peanut butter
for my girls before getting back to work.
I’m lucky to have work, I’ve heard a dozen people
tell me in the past week. The Dominican check-out girls
have no union though surely they thirst for something
greater. I can’t know. I don’t speak their language.
I am one of those who has sat at the bar with his whiskey,
whispering to himself on an unchosen night, I was born
too late,
thinking I might have liked to have lived through
the Depression and now it looks as if I will get my wish.
But will I get my FDR? No I will get my Obama,
the first president to have a name that begins with O.
O, Obama, be not the chosen, but the unchosen
of the unchosen revolution, not around the corner
but here on St. Nicholas Avenue where the swollen tribes
of unchosen are chanting, Africa come home, and raising
their sunbroad arms to demand of you to be what they believe
you are.

John Paul O’Connor resides in New York City and in Franklin, NY. His poems have appeared recently in Indiana Review, Eclipse, Lilies and Cannonballs and Rattle, on whose website you can hear him read his poem, “Stone City.” John hopes we will all do what Obama has urged us to do, which is to keep the pressure on to make sure he is the president we want him to be.
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John Updike

This news is a bit surreal for me. Yesterday R and I were talking about Updike because we may be in a position to purchase a signed first edition copy of one of his novels. I carelessly mentioned that we should probably purchase said book because Updike is wonderful and he is also old, which means when he dies (I didn’t know he had lung cancer) the book will be worth even more. I believe I said “he’s going to kick it soon.”

Sigh.

Yes. Ahem. I know.

Anyway. Here is the link to the NY Times article:

John Updike, the kaleidoscopically gifted writer whose quartet of Rabbit Angstrom novels highlighted so vast and protean a body of fiction, verse, essays and criticism as to place him in the first rank of among American men of letters, died on Tuesday. He was 76 and lived in Beverly Farms, Mass.

Tuesday (winter warning postponed) Musings

OK. We received an inch of snow. I was about to say I told you so to the weather man this morning, until I saw the forecast for this afternoon/evening into Wednesday morning. We’re supposed to get 6-8 inches. The last time it snowed this much was two years ago over Valentine’s Day and I didn’t go to work for three days. We were living outside of downtown at the time, and you couldn’t get out of your neighborhood because the side streets were impassable. Fortunately, we live on a main street now, although the parking lot situation could get interesting. Again, I’m not holding my breath because it could miss us. If it doesn’t, you’ll be seeing lots of winter wonderland photos tomorrow.
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I posted this note on Facebook but I thought I’d reproduce it here. I should be grading journals.

25 Random Thoughts About Me

1. I like animals more than I like most people.
2. I adore and am fiercely protective of my younger sister. She is my opposite and yet looking at her, I sometimes feel like I’m looking into a mirror.
3. I believe flowers are mystical, mythical, intimate, erotic, and full of poetry.
4. I feel things deeply and it makes my life difficult sometimes. Emotions rule my decisions and that can be dangerous.
5. I love being outdoors. I love mud and snow and rain and ice. I love walking in the woods no matter the season.
6. Other people’s pain often reduces me to tears, which is why I try to avoid daytime talk shows. I do not revel in others heartbreak.
7. I am an English instructor at a community college and I think it may be some of the most important work I will ever do. My students are damaged and vulnerable, but they are also brave and optimistic. They humble me on a daily basis.
8. I am in constant awe of how many brilliant people I know.
9. I am very interested in organic food, sustaining local farmers, and farmer’s markets. I’ve been this way since I was small. My parents come from a family of farmers (dairy) and I want to make this a more prominent part of my life. I admire and like the idea of being an integrally involved in the entire process of growing food. I cannot wait until I can plant my own vegetable garden.
10. Poetry is the stuff of life and I wish more people loved it like I do. I try to bring it to my classroom everyday. I wish more people read poetry.
11. I love taking pictures. I prefer flowers to faces, but I love experimenting with film and light and angle.
12. I love art and museums. My mother introduced me to art as a young child, because she is a painter. I would like to take oil, acrylic, and watercolor classes. Some of my favorite memories from when I was a kid were going to the Met to see the Matisse exhibit or going to the Cleveland Art Museum to see a Faberge exhibit or going to the Warhol Museum in Pittsburgh.
13. I want to travel more. I spent 6 months in England my junior year in college and that sparked my interest. I like travel writing and I’d like to do some more of that too.
14. I’d like to write nonfiction but I’m scared. Not of the content but of writing prose. I know. I’m a wimp.
15. I could not live life without a dog in the house.
16. I am a daddy’s girl and will always be one. I’m constantly amazed by my father and all of his accomplishments. When I was younger, I worried about living up to the standard he set, but as I get older I’m just grateful I have such a good example for a dad.
17. I cut my face open shaving when I was a little girl. I wanted to be like dad. My mother said she had never seen so much blood.
18. I rode horses/ponies from the time I was 9 till I was about 22. Selling my horse, Cannes, was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. My two older equines, Sprite and Daniel, were best friends. They are buried out behind our barn. When I visit my parents house, I go and stand on their graves to say hello.
19. I don’t like funerals or wakes. Not because they’re depressing, but because they feel fake and somber. I think you should celebrate the life that passed and traditional funerals don’t seem to focus on that.
20. It saddens me to know that we will eventually live in a world where children will no longer feel a book in their hands. Instead, they’ll have one of those reader things they’re selling on Amazon. I’m already mourning that loss.
21. I was in a sorority, Kappa Alpha Theta, in college and it was one of the best experiences of my life. I met and kept some really great friends through that organization, so it bothers me when people dismiss sorority girls as superficial.
22. I am intolerant of intolerance of any kind. I can’t stand for bullying. I’m serious enough about this that recently at Target when a bunch of teenage girls were walking behind an overweight woman and openly criticizing her, I said something. They stopped.
23. I’m willing to give people second chances, but after that it is going to be hard to get me back. I never forget.
24. I love writers. They frustrate me and fuel me. I’m glad I know so many.
25. I read The New Yorker regularly. It takes me forever but I learn a lot from it.
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Monday (winter storm warning…) Musings

We’re supposed to get some snow starting tonight and continuing through Wednesday. Indiana is different in the respect that they’ve already issued the storm warning and schools are already “closing in preparation.” This has happened in the past and the snow has gone right over us. We’ll see.
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I’m still thrilled with my camera. Here are some pictures I took this afternoon.



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Hair

In a scene in the film
shot at Bergen-Belsen days after
the liberation of the camp
a woman brushes her hair.

Though her gesture is effortless
it seems also for the first time
as if she has just remembered
that she has long hair,

that it is a pleasure
to brush, and that pleasure
is possible. And the mirror
beside which the camera must be rolling,

the combing out and tying back
of the hair, all possible.
She wears a new black sweater
The relief workers have brought,

Clothes to replace the body’s
visible hungers. Perhaps
she is a little shy of the camera,
or else she is distracted

by the new wool and plain wonder
of the hairbrush, because
on her face is a sort of dulled,
dreamy look, as if part

of hersef that recognizes
the simple familiar good of brushing
is floating back into her
the way the spiritualists say

the etheric body returns to us
when we wake from sleep’s long travel.
With each stroke she restores
something of herself, and one

at a time the arms and hands
and face remember, the scalp
remembers that her hair
is a part of her, her own.

Mark Doty